Loneliness is Lovely

Loneliness is lovely. Supreme bestows loneliness on people to provide them with an opportunity to search for their true self and get connected to Supreme source of love and joy. In loneliness you can hear the sounds of true harmony, rhythm and perfection of Universal design. Use this loneliness to create something beautiful by developing a hobby that engrosses your whole attention. It may be reading, painting, gardening, music etc. May be through your hobby, you will get a friend or co-traveler of your own frequency.

Me, My self, My God

My Soul

And

My Tranquility

I am Five

I am not alone

This tranquility is what God loves!

Truth always conquers .....Love never fails....Karm is Dharm

Violence against women in Congo, India and Guatemala

Violence against women is not only the most widespread example of a human rights violation, but probably the least evident, going largely unpunished. This is shown by the reports published and research conducted by the United Nations, international human rights agencies and the global women’s and feminist movements which have been denouncing this situation for decades.

Violence against women is a worldwide phenomenon affecting all societies, regardless of their political and economic systems; it affects all cultures, social classes and ethnic groups. This violence is largely exercised by men against women, and it both reflects and reinforces gender inequality. However, in most countries, only recently has it been considered a public human rights issue in which both society in general and the State has to react and take steps to halt such a situation and provide care for its victims.

Violence against women takes many forms, from domestic abuse to rape, sexual abuse and harmful cultural practices ranging from genital mutilation and honour crimes to premature marriage. Trafficking in women and girls to be exploited largely in the sex industry is another form of violence; furthermore, the fact that many women, especially young girls and adolescents, are unable to demand safe sex and reject undesired sex increases their risk of contagion with HIV/AIDS. In the context of wars and natural disasters, in which most of the refugees and displaced population are women and children, women are raped, kidnapped, mutilated and used as sex slaves; the systematic rape of women and girls has been used as a weapon in numerous armed conflicts.

 The dimensions of violence against women are alarming. According to different sources,

 The consequences of violence against women are devastating; survivors regularly suffer from emotional disorders and mental health problems for the rest of their lives, not to mention those who meet their death.

This project aims at contemplating violence against women as a historic and worldwide phenomenon.

 I have selected countries from different geographical areas with different situations, cultures, religions and levels of development; in each one, I describe both the specific social context and the different specific forms of violence, as follows:

 ·      Guatemala: the murders of women in Guatemala and Mexico in a climate of widespread violence against women.

·      India: It is estimated that there are 40 million girls less in India due to selective abortions and infanticides, acid attacks and other “honour” crimes against women.

·      Democratic Republic of Congo: In the eastern of The Democratic Republic of Congo, tens of thousands of women and young girls are being raped with impunity and extreme brutality by all sides in the conflict, civilians, militiamen, armed groups, foreign-armed groups and members of the Congolese Army.

GOMA, DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF CONGO - OCTOBER 17, 2008:

Nzigire, from a region near Goma called Sake, was raped by 3 members of the CNDP (Congrès National pour la Défense du Peuple/National Congress for the Defence of the People). They also shot her in her the breast. She was found and cared for by a female counselor from Sake, and later diverted to Gersom Hospital where they removed the bullet from her breast. Nzigire now suffers from mental disorders; she does not speak, she refuses to eat, and lies in bed the whole day. (I cannot put snap)

GUATEMALA CITY, GUATEMALA - APRIL 2, 2007:

Filomena Sajche, 30, reacts as she talks to a forensic doctor while filing charges against her husband at the Public Ministry building in Guatemala City.

MINOVA, DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF CONGO - NOVEMBER 29, 2008:

Mama Masika, who works in a counseling house that she founded in 2001, listens to Zabibu, 10. While collecting potatoes three days earlier in Kalungu, Zabibu was raped by two members of the CNDP (Congrès National pour la Défense du Peuple/National Congress for the Defence of the People). Mama Masika founded the house in 2001 after she recovered from her own experience with rape. In 1998 a group of Tutsi soldiers entered her village during the Congolese civil war. They killed her husband and cut him into pieces. They ordered Mama Masika to make a bed with the pieces. She was forced to lie on it and 12 soldiers raped her. Her two daughters, 12 and 14 years old, were also raped in the next room. After these attacks she fainted and when she woke up she found herself in a hospital. She could not remember what had happened to her. Months later, her daughter gave birth, but could not remember how she had gotten pregnant. Nobody was telling her the truth, until someone from a women’s organization started talking to her and helped her to understand what happened. After 3 years of counseling, she had recovered somewhat and decided to open this house to help women who are victims of sexual violence. Since 2001, she has helped 5,875 women and has also taken care of children who were born as a result of rape.

HARYANA, INDIA - SEPTEMBER 19, 2009:

A group of pregnant women wait for ultrasound examinations at a medical clinic in Haryana; the procedure is a vital diagnostic tool but can also be used to determine the sex of the foetus. A poster over their heads warns that sex-selective abortion is illegal and carries a sentence of five years in jail. The law, passed in 1994, penalizes medical professionals who contribute female foeticide by revealing the sex.

SALEM, INDIA - FEBRUARY 8, 2010:

A nurse takes care of abandoned baby girls in the Life Line Trust Home in Salem (Tamil Nadu). In its latest initiative to wipe out the practice of female foeticide and female infanticide, the government of Tamil Nadu has set up cradles homes where unwanted girls can be abandoned.

JAIPUR, INDIA, FEBRUARY 1, 2010:

Shahin, 13 years old, polishes semi-precious stones inside a house in Jaipur, Rajasthan, India, known as the Indian “city of gems” on February 1, 2010. She earns 50 rupees (US$ 1) per day, most of which goes toward helping her family save for the dowry and wedding expense they will pay when she marries. Two hundred thousand rupees will be needed to pay the expenses of her wedding. 

HARYANA, INDIA - OCTOBER 2, 2009:

Suman, 19 years old, eats on the floor while her husband sits above on the charpoy in the village of Madina, (Haryana). Born and raised in Assam, Suman was forcibly brought to Madina by a trafficker and sold to her husband for 40 000 rupees (US$ 842) at the age of 17. Some 20 years after the onset of sex-selective abortion, young men in India now face a shortage of eligible brides and are prepared to take desperate measures. As a result, there has been a sharp increase in trafficking of women from other regions of India or from countries such as Bangladesh or Nepal.

PUNJAB, INDIA - NOVEMBER 2, 2009:

A group of women sits idly in their room inside a protection home in Rothak (Haryana). Many of the residents were rescued after been trafficked to be sold as wives or to work as prostitutes in Haryana and Delhi; they seem almost paralyzed by the trauma of their experiences.

Female Foeticide : A Hall of Shame

More than a hundred million women are missing because their parents wanted a son.

Female foeticide is a process of aborting perfectly healthy female foetuses after about 18 weeks (or more) of gestation just because they are females. The same foetuses would've been allowed to live if they were males. There is no question that female foeticide is not just unethical but it is downright cruel as well.

Despite a law banning sex selective abortion is in force for a decade, as many as half a million female foetuses are aborted each year in the country. Gender discrimination in our society is so entrenched, that it begins even before a girl is born. Baby girls are throttled, poisoned or drowned in a bucket of water.

A baby girl tied in polythene bag and dumped in a public dustbin left to be torn away by wild stray dogs. An incident that took place nowhere else but in the very capital of our country.

To cite a couple of more examples, of many, the recovery of pieces of bones of newly born female fetuses from a hospital backyard in Ratlam district of Madhya Pradesh in February 2008. And bodies of more than 100 fetuses found outside an abortion clinic in Pattran town in Punjab in August last year were both deplorable. 

Though India has a history of skewed female sex ratio, what the country is witnessing today is the systematic extermination of the female child, with the ultrasound machine serving as an instrument of murder.

Clinics offering ultrasound scanning facility have mushroomed throughout the country, and despite making pre-natal sex determination a penal offence, doctors and parents alike rampantly violate this law. A survey in Maharashtra showed that an alarming 95% of the amniocentesis scan were being carried out for sex determination.

In India, the 2001 census reveals that the overall sex ratio is 933 females for every 1000 males, showing a marginal increase of 6 points from the 1991 census of 927. However, this is a very sorry state indeed and we are doing much worse than over a hundred years ago when the sex ratio was 972 in 1901, 946 in 1951 till the 933 today.

More and more baby girls have either been aborted or killed as infants since 1961 and that this trend continues strong even today. Indeed, an improvement in the child sex ratio has only been marked in one state, Kerala, and two Union Territories, Lakshwadeep and Pondicherry. Everywhere else, there is a decrease in the number of girls.

The greatest offenders in this area are the northern and the western states, with Punjab and Haryana leading the pack. In Punjab, the child sex ratio has decreased by 77 points to a new and horrifying low of 798 females to a 1000 males, and Haryana has seen a decrease of 60 points, meaning there are now only 819 females to a 1000 males. Other offenders high on this list are Himachal Pradesh, Delhi, Chandigarh and Gujarat.

This is not so much a legal problem as it is a social disease. The son-centric model of our society forms the foundation of the practice of female feticide and infanticide. Girls are made to face discrimination before birth, at birth, and throughout their lives at the hands of their families. Even those girls who are allowed to live get second-class treatment. They are denied adequate medical and health care facilities, they are denied adequate nutrition, and they are denied educational facilities. They are often subject to physical and sexual abuse.

This is not so much a legal problem as it is a social disease. The son-centric model of our society forms the foundation of the practice of female feticide and infanticide. Girls are made to face discrimination before birth, at birth, and throughout their lives at the hands of their families. Even those girls who are allowed to live get second-class treatment. They are denied adequate medical and health care facilities, they are denied adequate nutrition, and they are denied educational facilities. They are often subject to physical and sexual abuse.

Unfortunately, various schemes to counter this situation brought out by many states as well as at the central level have been ineffective in reducing the extent of this problem. Removal of this practice must involve:

• Focus on the humanist, scientific and rational approach and a move away from the traditional teachings which support discrimination.

• Empowerment of women and measures to deal with other discriminatory practices such as dowry, etc.

• A strong ethical code for doctors.

• Simpler methods for complaint registration for all women, particularly those who are most vulnerable.

• Publicity for the cause through the media and increasing awareness amongst the people through NGOs and other organizations;

• Regular appraisal and assessment of the indicators of the status of women such as sex ratio, female mortality, literacy and economic participation.

Infanticide is a crime of murder and punishment should be given to both parents. There ought to be stricter control over clinics that offer to identify the sex of a fetus and stronger check on abortions to ensure that they are not performed for the wrong reasons. Doctors must also be sensitized and strong punitive measures must be taken against those who violate the law.

It has been calculated that more than a hundred million women are missing because their parents wanted a son. We have made significant scientific and technological progress and we churn out some of the brightest minds every year in every area possible. But if we can’t check  female feticide all this progress is absolutely worthless.

How can a society expect to survive without women? Indeed various studies have shown that having far fewer women in a society leads to increased violence in a society, particularly against women. If the macabre practice continues, it would spell doom for both sons and daughters and will have a disastrous impact on the future generations. 

 

Source: Based on a speech by Justice Y.K. Sabharwal, Chief Justice of India and newspaper reports.

The Dalit among Dalits

Even after reservation policy, positive changes and a constant support of the political machinery in the country towards eradication of discrimination against the Dalits, it is still not easy being a Dalit. So the question that comes to one's mind is - if being a Dalit is so tough, how tough will it be to live a life of a Dalit woman? Women in any caste are considered lowly creatures. So how does a lowly creature among the alleged lowly creatures live?

The Dalits who constitute roughly 16.23 per cent of our population, since the Constitution of India "cast a special responsibility on the State to promote with special care the education, economic interest of the Scheduled Castes and promised to protect them from all forms of exploitation and social injustice (Article 46)."

Dalit women in India are considered the Dalits among Dalits and suffer from a three-fold oppression — 

1. On account of gender because of existing patriarchy,
2. On account of their caste 'the untouchable',
3. Finally, on account of their class - as they hail from the poorest and most marginalized communities.

Census shows that 80% of the SCs live in rural areas and are dependent on wage employment. They have to contend with high rates of under employment leading to greater incidence of poverty. 

Femicide has been the system of dowry

The practice of Female Foeticide has been a centuries-old practice in rural India, so much so that it has become more predominant in the rural parts of India. However, the practice of femicide, in which an unborn baby is aborted or killed at birth simply because it is not a boy, is increasingly spreading from India’s poor and rural classes to affluent urban families. Selection of the sex of the foetus is a combination of personal choices, family issues, social, ethical, medical and even legal reasons. The Indian girl child is part of the society, which idolizes sons. This stems from the deep rooted ancient concept of having a son to carry on with the name and tradition of the family. Right from childhood, girls are made to accept the norms of patriarchal and male dominated society and they thus grow up accepting themselves to be inferior to boys. It is unfortunate that our society considers ‘male’ as the bread winner for the family, and therefore a more valuable asset than a girl child, who is looked upon as a liability in the family. Another key reason for femicide has been the system of dowry, prevalent in rural as well as now increasingly in urban India. Since most of the Indian population is at the poverty level, it is not possible to sustain a girl child because of the prevailing system.  The darker side of the problem arises from the want to get rid of the baby girl by the way of abortion. This follows from abortion been legalized by the government of India in 1971, leaving no room for debate about the necessity for the same. There can be no argument about the necessity to terminate pregnancy for medical reasons like congenital abnormalities and X-linked disorders. The fact that it has a genesis in the prenatal determination of sex is emphasized by the urban predominance due to availability of such facilities. Sex Determination Techniques which is a Pre-natal Diagnostic Technique is used for predicting the sex of an unborn offspring after conception preferably in the first four months of pregnancy. Such techniques are making inroads in the rural areas, whereby tilting the balance in favour of males by the way of female foeticide. The problem stands at a very thin dividing line between the medical reasons for termination of pregnancy and female foeticide based on antenatal sex determination. Selective abortions of the female foetuses in the 70s and 80s became common and led to severe disturbances in the male-female ratio over a period of time. India is one of the few countries where the overall sex ratio has been unfavourable to females. According to population survey reports, the sex ratio which was 972 females per 1000 males in 1901 was 933 females to 1000 males in 2001. The disparity in the ratio was more severe in Delhi, Haryana, Gujarat, Maharashtra, Punjab and Chandigarh. The child sex ratio (CSR) in India has also been indicative of a negative trend towards girl child for decades now. The sharp decline in CSR from 945 in 1991 to 927 in 2001 as brought forth by the 2001 census hit the public eye. Sociologists have speculated that such an imbalance would lead to greater incidence of rape, sharing of women within and outside wedlock, abductions, and in genital, in reducing women's freedom and mobility.

While there exists no quick and easy solution to the problem, it is possible to reduce gender inequality, which lies at the core offemicide. The first critical step is to challenge the patriarchal attitudes that applaud boys and undermine girls, and to create a culture that celebrates both the genders equally. More so, the medical fraternity can do a lot of service by preventing the practice of female foeticide.

Female foeticide in India

Eligible Jat boys from Haryana travel 3,000 km across the country to find themselves a bride. With increasingly fewer girls in Haryana, they are seeking brides from as far away as Kerala as the only way to change their single status.

The girls have not vanished overnight. Decades of sex determination tests and female foeticide that has acquired genocide proportions are finally catching up with states in India.

This is only the tip of the demographic and social problems confronting India in the coming years. Skewed sex ratios have moved beyond the states of Punjab, Haryana, Delhi, Gujarat and Himachal Pradesh. With news of increasing number of female foetuses being aborted from Orissa to Bangalore there is ample evidence to suggest that the next census will reveal a further fall in child sex ratios throughout the country.

The decline in child sex ratio in India is evident by comparing the census figures. In 1991, the figure was 947 girls to 1000 boys. Ten years later it had fallen to 927 girls for 1000 boys.

Since 1991, 80% of districts in India have recorded a declining sex ratio with the state of Punjab being the worst.

States like Maharashtra, Gujarat, Punjab, Himachal Pradesh and Haryana have recorded a more than 50 point decline in the child sex ratio in this period.

Despite these horrific numbers, foetal sex determination and sex selective abortion by unethical medical professionals has today grown into a Rs. 1,000 crore industry (US$ 244 million). Social discrimination against women, already entrenched in Indian society, has been spurred on by technological developments that today allow mobile sex selection clinics to drive into almost any village or neighbourhood unchecked.

The PCPNDT Act 1994 (Preconception and Prenatal Diagnostic Techniques Act) was modified in 2003 to target the medical profession - the ‘supply side’ of the practice of sex selection. However non implementation of the Act has been the biggest failing of the campaign against sex selection

According to the latest data available till May 2006, as many as 22 out of 35 states in India had not reported a single case of violation of the act since it came into force. Delhi reported the largest number of violations – 76 out of which 69 were cases of non registration of birth! Punjab had 67 cases and Gujarat 57 cases. 

But the battle rages on.

In a recent landmark judgment the Mumbai High Court upheld an amendment to the PCPNDT Act banning sex selection treatment. The Court pronounced that pre natal sex determination would be as good as female foeticide. Pre-conception sex determination violated a woman’s right to live and was against the Constitution, it said.

While the boys from Haryana may have found a temporary solution to the problem of missing brides, experts warn that the demographic crisis will lead to increasing sexual violence and abuse against women and female children, trafficking, increasing number of child marriages, increasing maternal deaths due to abortions and early marriages and increase in practices like polyandry.

There have been only two convictions -- a fine of 300 rupees ($7) and another fine of 4,000 rupees ($98) -- from over 400 cases lodged under the Pre-conception and Pre-natal Diagnostic Techniques Act.

Bringing about changes in the demand for sex determination is a long process and has to be tackled through women’s education and empowerment including the right to property and land rights. States in the North East and in Kerala where women have these rights show a comparatively better sex ratio.

The battle against sex selection has proved to be long drawn out. But some signs are visible that demonstrate that the fight can be won.

Lakhanpal, a small village in Punjab has turned the tide of male births for the first time. In a state that has the lowest sex ratio in the country, the village boasts of 1,400 girls for every 1000 boys.

Arvind Kumar, the collector of Hyderabad district has illustrated the power of the Act. Hyderabad had the lowest child sex ratio (0-6 years) in Andhra Pradesh. After taking over in 2004 he tracked down all 389 diagnostic clinics in the city and took action. 361 ultrasound scan centres were issued notices for non compliance with the PNDT Act.

Licenses of 91 centres were cancelled. 83 machines were seized and 71 released after an undertaking and fine. Three suppliers were prosecuted for supplying machines to clinics with no registration licenses.

love

Love is . . . .......Being happy for the other person when they are happy, Being sad for the person when they are sad, Being together in good times, And being together in bad times.
LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF STRENGTH.

Love is . . . Being honest with yourself at all times, Being honest with the other person at all times, Telling, listening, respecting the truth, And never pretending.
LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF REALITY.

Love is . . . An understanding so complete that you feel as if you are a part of the other person, Accepting the other person just the way they are, And not trying to change them to be something else.
LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF UNITY.

Love is . . . The freedom to pursue your own desires while sharing your experiences with the other person, The growth of one individual alongside of and together with the growth of another individual. 

LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF SUCCESS.
Love is . . . The excitement of planning things together, The excitement of doing things together.

LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF THE FUTURE.

Love is . . . The fury of the storm, The calm in the rainbow.

LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF PASSION.

Love is . . . Giving and taking in a daily situation, Being patient with each other's needs and desires.

LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF SHARING.

Love is . . . Knowing that the other person will always be with you regardless of what happens, Missing the other person when they are away but remaining near in heart at all times.

LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF SECURITY.
LOVE IS . . . THE SOURCE OF LIFE!

Life

Promise Yourself

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel that there is something in them
To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.

To think only the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words but great deeds.
To live in faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

First Feel

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved nd the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.